<\/p>\n
Stan Herschfield<\/strong><\/span> paced his apartment at 3 a.m., waking up the tenants below. I asked Herschfield to ease up, and he said, \u201cWhat do you want from me? I can\u2019t fly.\u201d He moved out shortly after that. About 10 years later, he called me: \u201cStratton, you remember me — Herschfield. I want to move back in.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cHerschfield!\u201d I said, emoting like I was in a bad JCC play. \u201cYou painted the floor! You complained about the deaf guy across the hall blasting organ music! You complained about the people below you fornicating! You skipped out on your final month\u2019s rent! It cost me fifty dollars to clean the place. But you did teach me some Yiddish words.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI didn\u2019t skip! Those yentzers<\/em> below, they drove me out!\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYou painted<\/strong><\/span> the kitchen floor.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cBut I used Benjamin Moore. Only the best!\u201d<\/p>\n I didn\u2019t let him back. Maybe I should have. I\u2019ve allowed old tenants back in. Usually not into the same suite, but often in the same building. I save records on previous tenants. F. Scott Fitzgerald said bookkeeping is not a sexy subject, but it is somewhat interesting. I wish I hadn\u2019t thrown out my dad\u2019s tax returns, which would make interesting reading now that I\u2019m older and into nuanced returns. I have mini-dossiers on ex-tenants. Nothing personal, no nude posture photos like those Ivy League colleges used to do, just notes on whether the tenant paid his final month\u2019s rent, turned in his keys and didn\u2019t trash the place. If all\u2019s well, I\u2019ll let them back. Could be a decade later. The good tenants, you don\u2019t remember. You have to look them up. Herschfield, I remember.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Stan Herschfield paced his apartment at 3 a.m., waking up the tenants below. I asked Herschfield to ease up, and he said, \u201cWhat do you want from me? I can\u2019t fly.\u201d He moved out shortly after that. About 10 years later, he called me: \u201cStratton, you remember me — Herschfield. I want to move back […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[12],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-28815","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-landlord-biz"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/28815","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=28815"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/28815\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":28970,"href":"https:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/28815\/revisions\/28970"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=28815"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=28815"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=28815"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}