{"id":26396,"date":"2019-05-01T08:00:51","date_gmt":"2019-05-01T12:00:51","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/?p=26396"},"modified":"2019-05-22T08:51:44","modified_gmt":"2019-05-22T12:51:44","slug":"lactose-intolerant","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/2019\/05\/01\/lactose-intolerant\/","title":{"rendered":"LACTOSE INTOLERANT"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #993366;\"><strong>I shot<\/strong> <\/span>a cow because it was crippled and couldn\u2019t walk. Then my dad sold the dead cow to the Amish for meat. We couldn\u2019t sell it to anybody else because it wasn\u2019t \u201cchoice.\u201d My dad loved everything about cows: barns, ice cream, blintzes. He had me throw baseballs against the side of\u00a0 the barn like Bob Feller used to. My dad thought I might be the next Rapid Robert. Didn\u2019t happen.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright wp-image-26461 size-medium\" style=\"border: 2px solid #000000;\" src=\"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/home\/yiddis6\/public_html\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/milk-300x217.jpg\" alt=\"milk\" width=\"300\" height=\"217\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/home\/yiddis6\/public_html\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/milk-300x217.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/home\/yiddis6\/public_html\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/milk-768x555.jpg 768w, https:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/home\/yiddis6\/public_html\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/milk.jpg 800w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/>I planned to attend Ohio State to major in dairy science, but my high school buddies &#8212; all non-dairy types &#8212; talked me into Michigan, where I majored in diary science (creative writing).<\/p>\n<p>After college I spent a year in Israel at a kibbutz milking cows in the <em>refet<\/em> (dairy barn). I like unpasteurized milk, but it\u2019s hard to find. I like ordering milk at bars. Women love that. They say, \u201cJames Cagney!\u201d<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #993366;\"><strong>I have<\/strong><\/span> zero tolerance for the lactose intolerant.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I shot a cow because it was crippled and couldn\u2019t walk. Then my dad sold the dead cow to the Amish for meat. We couldn\u2019t sell it to anybody else because it wasn\u2019t \u201cchoice.\u201d My dad loved everything about cows: barns, ice cream, blintzes. He had me throw baseballs against the side of\u00a0 the barn [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[26],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-26396","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-fake-profiles"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26396","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=26396"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26396\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":26464,"href":"https:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26396\/revisions\/26464"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=26396"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=26396"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=26396"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}