{"id":29715,"date":"2022-05-04T08:00:51","date_gmt":"2022-05-04T12:00:51","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/?p=29715"},"modified":"2022-05-03T09:50:54","modified_gmt":"2022-05-03T13:50:54","slug":"happiness","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/2022\/05\/04\/happiness\/","title":{"rendered":"HAPPINESS"},"content":{"rendered":"

<\/p>\n

Because I<\/strong> <\/span>play happy music (i.e. klezmer), people think I know about happiness. And I do. Here are some guidelines for more happiness:<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. Wear shorts to a wedding. You\u2019ll draw attention to yourself and away from the bride. Perfect.<\/li>\n
  2. Invent a new colonoscopy flavor. Don’t do pineapple, cherry, lemon-lime or orange. These flavors have been taken.\u00a0 I’ll write up a story about you and submit it to the Wall Street Journal<\/em>.<\/li>\n
  3. Convert to Christianity (or Judaism). Why spend your life in one religion?<\/li>\n
  4. Drop in on your neighbor and see what kinds of Smucker\u2019s jelly they have. If they have Sugar Free Apricot, call the police.<\/li>\n
  5. If you feel really bad, grip a pen horizontally in your mouth and bite down until the ink cartridge explodes. This activates the happy muscles in your face — the ones that make you smile.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    —<\/p>\n

    I had an essay in the Cleveland Plain Dealer<\/em> on Sunday, “Strike up the (klezmer) bands for Ukraine.” <\/a><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    Because I play happy music (i.e. klezmer), people think I know about happiness. And I do. Here are some guidelines for more happiness: Wear shorts to a wedding. You\u2019ll draw attention to yourself and away from the bride. Perfect. Invent a new colonoscopy flavor. Don’t do pineapple, cherry, lemon-lime or orange. These flavors have been […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-29715","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-miscellaneous"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/29715","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=29715"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/29715\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":29772,"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/29715\/revisions\/29772"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=29715"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=29715"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=29715"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}