{"id":19188,"date":"2014-04-02T08:00:46","date_gmt":"2014-04-02T12:00:46","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/?p=19188"},"modified":"2014-04-02T08:05:54","modified_gmt":"2014-04-02T12:05:54","slug":"this-building-is-not-party-central","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/2014\/04\/02\/this-building-is-not-party-central\/","title":{"rendered":"“THIS BUILDING IS
NOT PARTY CENTRAL”"},"content":{"rendered":"

<\/p>\n

Here are<\/strong><\/span> my greatest letters (my greatest hits) to tenants:<\/p>\n

1. Dear Tenant,<\/em> The building manager heard you yelling out your window, “I\u2019m a porno star and a sex machine.” This isn\u2019t the only time this has occurred.<\/p>\n

2. Dear Tenant, <\/em>You flicked 20-to-30 cigarette butts out your window.\u00a0 Some of these butts landed on cars and left burn marks. This must stop!<\/p>\n

3. Dear Tenant, <\/em>You got in a fight with a female in your apartment and tore the door jamb off. Also, you have slipped unsolicited notes under the door of other tenants.\u00a0 That can be construed as sexual harassment, depending on the content of the notes. You are a self-described drunk.\u00a0 That, too, won\u2019t do here — at least not outside your apartment.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

4. Dear Tenant<\/em>,<\/strong><\/span> There was very loud recorded music coming from your suite between 3-5 a.m.\u00a0 That\u2019s when people sleep. You aren\u2019t living in a dormitory.<\/p>\n

5. Dear Tenant<\/em>, You were incessantly buzzing a neighbor\u2019s entry buzzer, banging on a neighbor\u2019s back door, and banging on your ceiling. You phoned me and said a neighbor\u2019s cat was annoying you by running across your ceiling.\u00a0 Tenants are allowed to have cats.\u00a0 The tenants pay extra for cats.<\/p>\n

6. Dear Tenant<\/em>, The hallway smells outside your apartment.\u00a0You need to clean up immediately.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

7. Dear Tenant<\/em>,<\/strong><\/span> you and a female visitor were drunk and screaming in the parking lot.\u00a0 She lay down on the ground.\u00a0 She could have gotten killed.<\/p>\n

8. Dear Tenant, <\/em>You disturbed other tenants\u2019 sleep at 3 a.m. by loud talking, running through the halls, and kicking on the locked door.\u00a0 Three tenants complained.\u00a0 Three!\u00a0 That\u2019s serious. Please understand, this building is not party central.<\/p>\n

—<\/p>\n

In case you missed Jack Stratton on NPR’s All Things Considered<\/em>, click here<\/a>.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Here are my greatest letters (my greatest hits) to tenants: 1. Dear Tenant, The building manager heard you yelling out your window, “I\u2019m a porno star and a sex machine.” This isn\u2019t the only time this has occurred. 2. Dear Tenant, You flicked 20-to-30 cigarette butts out your window.\u00a0 Some of these butts landed on […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[12],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-19188","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-landlord-biz"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19188","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=19188"}],"version-history":[{"count":10,"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19188\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":19447,"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19188\/revisions\/19447"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=19188"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=19188"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=19188"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}