I spit<\/strong><\/span> whenever and wherever I want.<\/p>\n I search the city dump for old toilet seats and crumpled milk cartons.\u00a0 I use them for collages.\u00a0 I reject traditional beauty.<\/p>\n I love TV.<\/p>\n I have<\/strong><\/span> very sexy legs.<\/p>\n I have a big house. I need another one.\u00a0 I\u2019m going to see a real estate agent on Friday.<\/p>\n I can’t read in the car.\u00a0 That’s my major weakness: motion sickness.<\/p>\n I want<\/strong><\/span> to be Mr. Rogers, but\u00a0not from Pittsburgh.\u00a0 I\u2019m tender and vivid, kids tell me.<\/p>\n My fields of expertise?\u00a0 A few . . .<\/p>\n Rock and roll trivia, Oriental rugs and baking.\u00a0 I talk mostly about baking, because everyone thinks that\u2019s great; everyone likes cake.<\/p>\n I wear a Speedo bathing suit around the house in the summer. I hate air conditioning.<\/p>\n I trigger<\/strong><\/span> crises.<\/p>\n I love movies — all kinds: avant-garde, Jewish, Gay\/Lesbian.\u00a0\u00a0 My favorite movie is The Awning Fabricator.\u00a0 <\/em>It’s Serbian. Exercise sucks.<\/span><\/p>\n I’ve<\/strong><\/span> had ink ooze from my pens into my pants.<\/p>\n My girlfriend, Kiki, is sumptuous, intense, curvaceous and grotesque. She is\u00a0 also a fugitive, mostly from my wife.<\/p>\n Let’s meet for lunch.\u00a0 I’m in Aspen today.\u00a0 I would love to see you.<\/p>\n Check out my lifestyle.<\/p>\n —<\/p>\n Footnote: Four percent of the above verbiage is stolen from the\u00a0 Poetry Project Newsletter.<\/em><\/small><\/p>\n —<\/span><\/p>\n Forecast: Klondikes at Wiley<\/p><\/div>\n Be at Wiley tomorrow night (7:30 p.m. Thurs., July 25). See Yiddishe Cup.<\/span><\/p>\n Wiley Middle School is at 2181 Miramar Blvd., University Hts., Ohio.\u00a0 Free music, free ice cream.\u00a0 Indoors if raining.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" This is a fake profile. I spit whenever and wherever I want. I search the city dump for old toilet seats and crumpled milk cartons.\u00a0 I use them for collages.\u00a0 I reject traditional beauty. I love TV. I have very sexy legs. I have a big house. I need another one.\u00a0 I\u2019m going to see […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[26],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-12516","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-fake-profiles"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12516","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=12516"}],"version-history":[{"count":10,"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12516\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":19280,"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12516\/revisions\/19280"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=12516"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=12516"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=12516"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}![\"\"](\"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/home\/yiddis6\/public_html\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/11\/toilet-seat-300x232.jpg\" "\\"toilet")
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\n<\/em><\/p>\n![\"\"](\"http:\/\/www.yiddishecup.com\/blog\/home\/yiddis6\/public_html\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/11\/wiley-ice-cream-300x219.jpg\" "\\"wiley")