Real Music & Real Estate . . .

Yiddishe Cup’s bandleader, Bert Stratton, is Klezmer Guy.
 

He knows about the band biz and – check this out – the real estate biz too. So maybe he’s really Klezmer Landlord.
 

You may not care about the real estate biz. Hey, you may not care about the band biz. (See you.)
 

This is a blog with a gamy twist. It features tenants with snakes and skunks, and musicians with smoked fish in their pockets.
 

Stratton has written op-eds for the New York Times, Wall Street Journal and Washington Post.


 
 

I OWNED A MEDICAL OFFICE BUILDING

The medical office building was right next to Pizza Hut, Burger King and Boston Market. Every time I went to the medical building I felt crappy. What was I doing in Pizza Hut land?

Who owns all the restaurants, office buildings, and gas stations in Solon, Ohio? Guys like me. I owned a medical building, complete with docs, dentists, massotherapists and chiropractors. I ran a 30,000 square-foot mini-hospital. A hazardous-waste company picked up surgical needles. The HVAC filters were hospital-grade so the patients wouldn’t breathe anything but the purest air. The windows didn’t open much.

I put up some oil paintings in the lobby. My friend Irwin Weinberger painted them. A tenant, a doc, texted me: “If you can put that up, how about painting my wall?” So we painted his wall. That doc was picky. He had vanity plates that read “DDS MD.” (A real estate broker once told me doctors are the worst tenants “because they think they’re God.”)

moneyThe A/C bill for the building was $2,500.month. That’s some air. Also, I paid the snowplow guy an extra $125 per push for salt because I didn’t want any patients falling in the parking lot. Don’t forget the elevator guy, the security company, and we had a phone line to the elevator in case anybody got stuck in there. One day the elevator went out completely. That was a bad day. There was only one elevator in the building. “How are my elderly patients going to get to the third floor!” They’re not.

Every Dollar General Store, Burger King, medical office building and car lot in the world is owned by somebody. I already said that but it bears repeating. I’m an owner. I took a risk buying that medical office building; I wasn’t sure docs would re-up because independent docs were phasing out. I sold the building. Now I never go there.

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4 comments

1 don friedman { 04.17.19 at 12:13 pm }

Did Irwin repossess the artwork? If not you should have received a premium for the building!

2 MARC Adler { 04.17.19 at 3:15 pm }

Is this a true story? A kosher and joyous Pesach to you and your family.
Marc

3 Bert Stratton { 04.17.19 at 4:28 pm }

To Marc Adler:

It’s a true story. (About 80% of these blog stories are true.)

4 Ken Goldberg { 04.18.19 at 8:14 am }

Very profound, though it took me 7.6 hours to read this – tsk! I’m glad Irwin got some work out of it. Now they can sell bagels in the lobby….

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