THE PROPER-SIZE MEAT PORTION
Dr. Michael Roizen, the longevity guru, spoke at my temple men’s club. He said take 6-to-8 supplements a day. He said he hadn’t eaten ice cream since 1993. A good-natured heckler said, “And that’s when you stopped growing!” Roizen is about 5-5. Roizen gave the heckler a fist-bump, acknowledging the man’s comment was the best moment of the lecture.
Roizen says eat more turmeric, fish oil and vitamin D. And here are few more tips:
Meat portion . . . the size of two fists and a ping-pong ball.
Get a flu shot unless you’re allergic to “wool.”
Waffles for breakfast every day. But no maple syrup.
Avoid fad diets.
Pregnant and breastfeeding women should avoid apples from Washington State. Bad chemicals up there.
People over 70: exercise more. Run or walk 25,000 steps a day. You can break that up.
Fight for the little guy — anybody under 5-7.
Play the lottery. Bet daily — and a lot. You’ll feel better.
Say “yes” to wine and beer, but no more than four drinks a day, ladies, and no more than eight drinks a day, gents. And don’t knock Miller Lite and other “piss waters,” to quote Roizen.
Chocolate is good for you. We know that, but here’s the latest: eat a marshmallow before and after your chocolate intake. The mallow triggers many good enzymes.
The first two paragraphs are true. The rest isn’t.